Don’t get me wrong, I love my Son, dearly I love my Son. And we have done all of the typical Father Son bondings–playing catch, learning to ride a bike, teaching him to drive, being respectful to others (especially women), knowing how to act in social situations. And he has grown into a very decent young man, very much in my mold. Anything he needs, he knows all he has to do is ask. Nothing at all I would change about that. But…when my Daughter was born, everything changed for me.
From the moment CrazyBitch and I found out we were having a girl, I began stressing out. In the Doctor’s office when they broke the news, I was frantic. I even ask them to check again-was his wiener was just too small to find at that point? But alas, I would need to prepare for the inevitable. A Girl. I began to believe that karma must me real, and all of my past relationships would come back to haunt me.
Then she was born. Instantaneously it was over. My way of thinking changed. My values changed. My perceptions of what a woman should be, all changed. I had evolved, in the blink of an eye. As she grew, I found myself participating in tea parties, playing dolls, having dress-up fashion shows. It was CRAZY! This phenomenon had completely taken over. She grew some more, and we started watching girly movies and shows together, singing along to pop songs–and don’t even get started on the whole Hannah Montana thing!
She grew further, her dance career began and there was no end to my support (and trust me, I HATED those dance recitals). Her singing career flourished, and I felt the need to show everyone I knew videos of her singing as if I believed she had made the big time. I supported every single thing that she wanted to be involved in. I was the epitome of a Girl Dad–and it now longer bothered me, at all.
As time went by, I found myself not only supporting her in her ventures, but I began embracing strong females everywhere. Watching movies with female lead characters, trying to find out their stories to see how they may be similar to my daughter’s journey. Paying attention to women’s athletics, taking note of the influences which women like Dawn Staley have had and how they continue to teach and grow young people. Listening to female led rock bands, and even trying to find all female groups. Artists like Lzzy Hale and Maria Brink (who are both AMAZING artists and people) were just the beginning. I am full on supporting groups like The Warning and Baby Metal to no end. I share this information with any one who will listen. And I realize, as I’ve mentioned in a previous post, it must have all started with Alanis Morrisette–there is no stronger female persona than her.
In the end, I love both of my children to no end. Neither one of them more or less. And there is nothing which I would not do for either of them. But, becoming a Girl Dad has definitely changed me. I have always been respectful of women–I do not talk down to them, I hold doors and open car doors, I speak kindly to them, and I listen to what they have to say. The difference now is that I also support women. And if we can all just make a small effort in the same direction, it will make a huge difference for equality.